The Body Knows is where we discuss healing, somatics and embodiment, and why trying to “fix yourself” never really works. If that makes you exhale, follow us on Substack, YouTube, Apple Podcast, Spotify, or your favorite podcast app.
If podcasts aren’t your thing, we’ve outlined the key ideas from the episode below. But the real juice lives in the full dialogue between us. If something here sparks for you, we highly recommend listening to the full episode.
Our first episode about the dark goddess went unexpectedly viral, which clarified what we’ve felt in ourselves: women are starving for a way to reclaim power without becoming hardened.
There’s a particular kind of tension many women live with. We’re taught to be kind, accommodating, and agreeable if we want to belong. Which, in a nutshell, is a chronic state of self abandonment — outsourcing our sense of worth to the approval of others (*ahem* aka the male gaze). But when we try to reclaim our power, the only models we’re given are domination, aggression, or becoming what people love to call “a bitch.”
So in this episode, we explored an accessible doorway into reclaiming power: the lioness. A way of being that holds boundaries without hardness, fierceness without chaos, and power without domination. If you struggle with people-pleasing, self-sacrifice, or feeling like you’re stuck between doormat and dragon, the lioness is for you.
Let’s get into it.
1) The lioness doesn’t explain her boundaries. She radiates them.
Imagine for a second, a lioness stretched out under a shady tree. She stretches out, full-bodied, and adjusts to another position. Then lion approaches — her head snaps up, and she glares. He slows down. Finally, she blinks, letting him know he can come closer. At every point, she is signaling what she will accept and what she will not.
This archetype teaches us there is a way of being that communicates before a word is spoken. You’ve met people like this. You just know how to approach them. (Or, you’re a dense fool.)
The lioness doesn’t acquiesce, explode, or over-explain. She simply holds herself in a way that transmits her standards like a force field around her.
This is the first lesson of the lioness: your standards don’t have to be loud. They can simply be transmitted through how you hold yourself — your posture, your gaze, the way your voice comes out. Not “um, excuse me, could you stop?” but a look that makes the approaching lion pause mid-step.
2) Standards, expectations, boundaries, and requests
There is so much confusion around the word "boundary." People set rules and call them boundaries. People have unspoken expectations and then when they’re not met, they say a boundary has been crossed. So here's the framework (shoutout to Dr. Raquel Martin and Cami Orange for this one):
Standards - Standards come from your values. They answer the question: What kind of behavior do I allow in my life? These generally aren't things you announce, rather they dictate who you allow in your life.
Examples:
• I value reliability
• I value mutual care
• I value respect for my time
Expectations - Expectations are hopes about how people will show up. The tricky part is they’re often unspoken. When we feel disappointment or anger, we can usually peel back the layers and find an expectation that wasn't communicated.
Examples:
• I expect my friends to show up when they say they will
• I expect communication when plans change
Rules vs Requests - A rule tries to control someone else whereas a request invites collaboration. Requests keep agency intact and respect both people. They say I care about my needs and I respect yours too.
Instead of “Don’t text me after 10pm” you can say “Could you not text me after 10pm?”
Boundaries - Boundaries are something you enforce through your own behavior, not by controlling another person’s. They clarify how you will act.
Examples:
• I don’t respond to texts after 10pm
• If I feel overwhelmed, I take space from the conversation
3) The lioness is fierce AND loving
Think about the last time you stayed too long in a situation that wasn’t serving you: a relationship, a job, a friendship. Likely, you would say that all that time, you were letting your heart lead — seeing the best in someone, wanting to make it work. But there was now power in you saying I deserve better than this. I’m not available for this treatment. All heart but no ferocity, because you didn’t know what you were standing in your power for.
The archetype of lioness teaches us how to have both. She’s not interested in power over, only power with and power for. She’s the warrior with a lover’s heart: fierce not because she’s trying to dominate, but because she’s devoted.
That’s the third door most of us were never shown. The lioness says your fierceness is your love. Your protection is your tenderness. You don’t have to harden yourself to be powerful, you just have to know what you’re protecting.
4) Power and pleasure belong together
Here’s the paradox the lioness teaches: you can surrender so much more deeply into your softness when you trust your own power. When you know you can say no, when you trust yourself to protect your space, softness becomes safer and pleasure becomes deeper. Because if something crosses your standards, you know you’ll handle it.
Now picture a lioness stretching. Slow, full-bodied, rippling from rib cage to hip. She’s not performing for anyone. There’s no audience, no male gaze she’s catering to. She’s simply inhabiting her body with her fullness. Power and pleasure aren’t separate for her, they’re intrinsically linked. The same body that can set a boundary with one look can dissolve into the sensation of sun on skin.
We’ve been taught that feminine pleasure is for consumption. For someone else’s benefit. The archetype of the lioness shows us otherwise. Her pleasure is hers. And she can access it so fully precisely because she trusts her own power to protect it.
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5) From thinking about it to being it.
If you’ve gone to therapy for awhile, you’ve likely experienced this infuriating disconnect: you can understand all your patterns and still not be able to feel, act, express in a different way. It’s because, silly, the body hasn’t been involved in the process.
That’s where embodiment comes in. You can practice inhabiting an energy or archetype (like the lioness) until you don’t have to think about how to set a boundary versus make a request versus accidentally have an expectation. Your nervous system simply knows what it feels like to radiate sovereignty and standards and fierce devotion. No more thinking. Just being. Thank f*ck.
Podcast Timestamps
0:00 — Introduction: the warrior with a lover’s heart
1:46 — Why we’re talking about the lioness archetype
4:40 — Embodiment: the missing piece of personal development
11:41 — How to set Boundaries: defining where people get confused
16:01 — Boundaries are about your behavior, not controlling others
20:50 — Requests vs. rules: a framework
27:30 — The fierce lover: why fierceness and devotion can coexist
29:16 — Boundaries as force field: when you wouldn’t dare to f*ck with her
32:35 — The paradox of softness and strength in feminine embodiment
37:05 — Primal sensuality: inhabiting your pleasure for yourself
41:46 — The tools of embodiment: breath, movement, sound & more
50:26 — The lioness as the backdoor into embodying the Queen
Links
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Practice your lioness embodiment with the support of this playlist.
Keep binging our podcasts by listening to the Dark Goddess episode next.
Follow Ana on IG here and Leona on IG here.
If you’re interested in one-on-one support, visit RoamAndRise.com.
Shaped by her own journey with healing chronic illness, Ana guides clients in embodying the changes they’ve been trying to make, so life feels steadier, more energized, and grounded in self-trust.
Her work weaves trauma-informed somatic practices with integrative health support, rooted in the belief that healing happens through relationship, not force. She is devoted to helping people return to a loving relationship with their bodies as the foundation for lasting health.
P.S. We’re also on YouTube!
You can watch this episode (along with our new intro, which we’re obnoxiously proud of) here:
